Connection for surgeons
Surgeons can struggle with relationships, for various reasons. However, resilience is between us, not only within us. Explore how to defend connection, and why it’s important.
Lilli Cooper’s no fluff newsletter.
Helping surgeons perform, and feel, better.
Lilli Cooper’s no fluff newsletter.
Helping surgeons perform, and feel, better.
Lilli Cooper’s no fluff newsletter.
Helping surgeons perform, and feel, better.
Humans are social animals
In our evolutionary past, belonging to, and being valued within, our social group really was a matter of life and death, and we are still wired to feel that way.
Relationships can be hard to maintain in busy jobs like surgery, but they are essential for our resilience and well-being. In the words of Dr Olivia Donnelly: “Resilience is between us, not only within us”.
Humans are social animals
In our evolutionary past, belonging to, and being valued within, our social group really was a matter of life and death, and we are still wired to feel that way.
Relationships can be hard to maintain in busy jobs like surgery, but they are essential for our resilience and well-being. In the words of Dr Olivia Donnelly: “Resilience is between us, not only within us”.
Humans are social animals
In our evolutionary past, belonging to, and being valued within, our social group really was a matter of life and death, and we are still wired to feel that way.
Relationships can be hard to maintain in busy jobs like surgery, but they are essential for our resilience and well-being. In the words of Dr Olivia Donnelly: “Resilience is between us, not only within us”.
Listen to the expert
Intimacy for surgeons with Jodie Milton:
Jodie Milton is a relationship and intimacy coach and co-creator of Practical Intimacy - a relationship blog with over 50K monthly readers.
She works alongside her husband, Reece, helping singles and couples to create connected relationships and deeply fulfilling lives. Since 2014 they’ve coached hundreds of couples and helped over 2 million readers with their unique approach to modern relationships, working with everyone from YouTube celebrities and Silicon Valley CEOs to stay-at-home parents and newlyweds. With Level 1 Certification in Gottman Therapy Method and training in a wide range of modalities, their work has featured in The New York Times, Bustle, Cosmopolitan and more.
Listen to the expert
Intimacy for surgeons with Jodie Milton:
Jodie Milton is a relationship and intimacy coach and co-creator of Practical Intimacy - a relationship blog with over 50K monthly readers.
She works alongside her husband, Reece, helping singles and couples to create connected relationships and deeply fulfilling lives. Since 2014 they’ve coached hundreds of couples and helped over 2 million readers with their unique approach to modern relationships, working with everyone from YouTube celebrities and Silicon Valley CEOs to stay-at-home parents and newlyweds. With Level 1 Certification in Gottman Therapy Method and training in a wide range of modalities, their work has featured in The New York Times, Bustle, Cosmopolitan and more.
Listen to the expert
Intimacy for surgeons with Jodie Milton:
Jodie Milton is a relationship and intimacy coach and co-creator of Practical Intimacy - a relationship blog with over 50K monthly readers.
She works alongside her husband, Reece, helping singles and couples to create connected relationships and deeply fulfilling lives. Since 2014 they’ve coached hundreds of couples and helped over 2 million readers with their unique approach to modern relationships, working with everyone from YouTube celebrities and Silicon Valley CEOs to stay-at-home parents and newlyweds. With Level 1 Certification in Gottman Therapy Method and training in a wide range of modalities, their work has featured in The New York Times, Bustle, Cosmopolitan and more.
Intimacy quiz from Practical Intimacy:
What intimacy type are you and how can you get more of that in your relationship?
Sometimes, connecting is easier side-by-side:
Self Space have created some walking prompts for side-by-side connection in different situations.
Tiny Human Things!
Find out more about awe and its links to human connection with my new podcast pilot.
Intimacy quiz from Practical Intimacy:
What intimacy type are you and how can you get more of that in your relationship?
Sometimes, connecting is easier side-by-side:
Self Space have created some walking prompts for side-by-side connection in different situations.
Tiny Human Things!
Find out more about awe and its links to human connection with my new podcast pilot.
Intimacy quiz from Practical Intimacy:
What intimacy type are you and how can you get more of that in your relationship?
Sometimes, connecting is easier side-by-side:
Self Space have created some walking prompts for side-by-side connection in different situations.
Tiny Human Things!
Find out more about awe and its links to human connection with my new podcast pilot.
Low hanging fruit:
Do try this at home
Spend more time with people you love.
Who do you love to spend time with? What are the social situations that nourish you and make you feel good about yourself? Catch ups with one or two others?
A meal with a group of friends? Big social events?
Shared experiences, activities or sports?
How can you prioritise that more? Maybe book in one of those in per week?
And how can you optimise the quality of your connection when you get there?
A good option is to make it phone-free.
Low hanging fruit:
Do try this at home
Spend more time with people you love.
Who do you love to spend time with? What are the social situations that nourish you and make you feel good about yourself? Catch ups with one or two others?
A meal with a group of friends? Big social events?
Shared experiences, activities or sports?
How can you prioritise that more? Maybe book in one of those in per week?
And how can you optimise the quality of your connection when you get there?
A good option is to make it phone-free.
Low hanging fruit:
Do try this at home
Spend more time with people you love.
Who do you love to spend time with? What are the social situations that nourish you and make you feel good about yourself? Catch ups with one or two others?
A meal with a group of friends? Big social events?
Shared experiences, activities or sports?
How can you prioritise that more? Maybe book in one of those in per week?
And how can you optimise the quality of your connection when you get there?
A good option is to make it phone-free.
Got 5 minutes?
In the coffee queue?
Or waiting for the patient?
Most of us are comfortable with going on a static bike or running machine to exercise, rather than go from a to b, but few of us connect with others just for connection’s sake. For a bit of oxy-dosin’, if you will!
Put your phone away and connect with someone. Ask them how they are, or what they’re up to. Thank them, give them a hand, or tell them something you appreciate about them. Shoot the breeze.
If you don’t feel like face-to-face contact, think about someone you love, or send them a message. Or think of something you're grateful for, or proud of, about yourself.
Got 5 minutes?
In the coffee queue?
Or waiting for the patient?
Most of us are comfortable with going on a static bike or running machine to exercise, rather than go from a to b, but few of us connect with others just for connection’s sake. For a bit of oxy-dosin’, if you will!
Put your phone away and connect with someone. Ask them how they are, or what they’re up to. Thank them, give them a hand, or tell them something you appreciate about them. Shoot the breeze.
If you don’t feel like face-to-face contact, think about someone you love, or send them a message. Or think of something you're grateful for, or proud of, about yourself.
Got 5 minutes?
In the coffee queue?
Or waiting for the patient?
Most of us are comfortable with going on a static bike or running machine to exercise, rather than go from a to b, but few of us connect with others just for connection’s sake. For a bit of oxy-dosin’, if you will!
Put your phone away and connect with someone. Ask them how they are, or what they’re up to. Thank them, give them a hand, or tell them something you appreciate about them. Shoot the breeze.
If you don’t feel like face-to-face contact, think about someone you love, or send them a message. Or think of something you're grateful for, or proud of, about yourself.
This course is still available – but this offer has expired. Subscribe to the newsletter for exclusive discounts.
July 2025
Self-directed Optimising Performance for Surgeons course
Goes live in July and I’m looking for 5 testers at 50% off.
Email me if you’re interested: 6 weeks of self-directed content, plus two 1:1 coaching sessions for £300 £150.
This course is still available – but this offer has expired. Subscribe to the newsletter for exclusive discounts.
July 2025
Self-directed Optimising Performance for Surgeons course
Goes live in July and I’m looking for 5 testers at 50% off.
Email me if you’re interested: 6 weeks of self-directed content, plus two 1:1 coaching sessions for £300 £150.
This course is still available – but this offer has expired. Subscribe to the newsletter for exclusive discounts.
July 2025
Self-directed Optimising Performance for Surgeons course
Goes live in July and I’m looking for 5 testers at 50% off.
Email me if you’re interested: 6 weeks of self-directed content, plus two 1:1 coaching sessions for £300 £150.
Disclaimer: This newsletter is provided for educational and informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice or professional services. The information shared should not be used for diagnosing or treating any health conditions. For personalised medical advice, please consult with a licensed healthcare professional.
Disclaimer: This newsletter is provided for educational and informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice or professional services. The information shared should not be used for diagnosing or treating any health conditions. For personalised medical advice, please consult with a licensed healthcare professional.
Disclaimer: This newsletter is provided for educational and informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice or professional services. The information shared should not be used for diagnosing or treating any health conditions. For personalised medical advice, please consult with a licensed healthcare professional.
Sign up for Lilli's Newsletter
A monthly letter sharing insights, reflections, and resources for clinicians and high stakes professionals who want to perform or feel better, or both!
Thoughtful content, no spam. Unsubscribe anytime.
Sign up for Lilli's Newsletter
A monthly letter sharing insights, reflections, and resources for clinicians and high stakes professionals who want to perform or feel better, or both!
Thoughtful content, no spam. Unsubscribe anytime.
Sign up for Lilli's Newsletter
A monthly letter sharing insights, reflections, and resources for clinicians and high stakes professionals who want to perform or feel better, or both!
Thoughtful content, no spam. Unsubscribe anytime.
Supporting healthcare professionals to thrive through evidence-based resources, coaching, and community.
Copyright Lilli Cooper © 2026, All Rights Reserved
Copyright Lilli Cooper © 2026
All Rights Reserved